sometimes…. im mad at myself.i used to be make her cry but know im more mature n will not ever again make her cry anymore.

sometimes, i wish im the oldest son so that i can help my mum to do all the heavy work.

sometimes,i wish i know what r in their mind that make them behave like that.

sometimes….i wish i can understand my brother n sister more

sometimes….i would rather be alone than be with them.

sometimes… i wish can go to the past…so that i would not do the stupid mistake.

sometimes… i wish i am more intelligent so that i can study in ovrsea n make my mum….

i dont know what i should type..im just randomly posting my mixed feeling right now…i’ve to many wish….

why???why????why???

pls try to understand this….hav to go…b*** home now….adios….

 well, today is my first post..i dont know what should i write(my english is not very good, so do my grammar…pls excuse it)..but i will try to improve it..the reason i started blogging is to burst out my feeling…i hav a lot to tell but i dont have anyone to talk to(someone i trust)…maybe by blogging i can make it..as ppl who read this dont know who i am….

 first of all, as usual im left alone in this big house..i really hate being alone…all my family members went out..i dont know where they went..they dont even bother to tell/talk with me. its like im invisble or not exist to them..but if  they hav trouble they will come straight to me and ask for my help.its not that i dont to help them, its just… they always hurt my feeling n make me cry and they dont seem to care for it..

i dont ask a big favour…is it really hard to tell me,where r they going?with whom?is it really difficult to tell me that.its just a simple qns.it will not hurt/injure them….

sometime i wish im back to the old house where there r more to do.although its it jst a small house n not a big one like now, i still like n love it. at least all of them is here n all my relatives is just near…no wonder there r a saying  “home sweet home”